— FEATURE STORY, LIFESTYLE —

Check on Your Friends, Even the Strong Ones

June 29, 2020

It’s been a little quiet around here lately. I had been feeling a little down and my anxiety was high so I decided it was best to take some time off for myself. The two weeks off was just what I needed to regroup and feel refreshed. 

A combination of things had me feeling blue- recent events with this summer’s Black Lives Matter movement, more tragic deaths of African Americans from police brutality, and just feeling overwhelmed with social media chatter. I had received a few messages from people I didn’t know very well who were “checking on me” after George Floyd’s murder and the protests around the country started. I honestly didn’t know how to feel at first because I’ve never received messages like that before. I’m sure the intention was sincere, but it made me feel a little uncomfortable. 

You never know what a person is going through so make you check on your friends and show them some love!

Don’t get me wrong- there’s nothing wrong with checking in on a person you don’t know. I do appreciate it when others show me their kindness and support. Everything just felt very confusing because events happened really quickly and I was trying to process what was happening.

So I had to unplug for a little bit. My break gave me time to reflect and rest. I was also able to take time and think about how others who have shown support were truly trying to offer their kindness and understand. Many were trying to listen and I realized it was a great opportunity to grow together.

I was only going to take a week off, but then I had something unexpected happen in my personal life (not related to the kids or Travis so no worries). It really knocked me down and I was feeling very low. 

Travis has been my rock during this time and always gives me his shoulder to cry on when I need it. Whenever I want to talk about how I’m feeling or just vent, he takes the time to listen to me. I don’t know what I’d do without him. 

I’m also very thankful for my mom who has taken the time to listen when I need to talk and offer caring advice. 

Then something unexpected happened last week. I had a few friends also notice my quiet mood. They reached out and texted me to simply say they were thinking of me and wanted to know if I was okay. 

I don’t usually share with others when I am feeling down. But when friends noticed my quiet mood, it really meant a lot to me that they wanted to show their love and support. It made me feel less alone and more supported. 

The old saying is true, “You never know what a person is going through.” We all experience hard times or go through a period of feeling down. Not everyone feels comfortable sharing they are going through a depression or they’re just having a bad day. That’s why it’s important we show kindness and love to one another. Our kind words or even a smile can brighten someone else’s day. 

It’s not weird to send a friend a message or call them on the phone to just say, “I was thinking of you and I wanted you to know I’m here if you need me.” It lets your loved one know you care about them and you support them. 

A few other ways you can check on your friends:

Send an encouraging text.

Give our friend a call on the phone.

Mail a greeting card.

Schedule a time to meet for coffee or lunch. (If you’re practicing social distancing or live far away from your friend, then you can send them a gift card to their favorite cafe or restaurant.)

During my time off, I was able to reflect and rest. I was also able to take time and think about how others who have shown support were truly trying to offer their kindness and understand. Many were trying to listen and I realized it was a great opportunity to grow together.

A thoughtful gesture can go a long way. It can truly make a huge difference in someone’s life. So please, don’t forget to check on your friends, even the strong the ones! 

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Feature image courtesy of Warner Bros. Entertainment. Living Single (1993) cast Erika Alexander, Queen Latifah, Kim Fields, and Kim Cole. 

What are your thoughts?